Ten Years of Breastfeeding

I was asked by a client how long I had breastfed for; a question that I ask my infant feeding clients all the time. I realised how difficult and emotive a question that can be to answer.

Do they mean breastfeeding directly at the breast for it to count? This child, or as a total of all my children? Exclusively or in combination with formula, or post-6 months, alongside foods and drink? What if it was started via a supplementary nursing system, or donor breastmilk, does that get added to the total count? Will I get judged if I fed my child for 3 days, 3 months, 3 years? 7 Years?

I did not plan to breastfeed. Not really. I went through the motions of telling healthcare professionals that I wanted to breastfeed, but I didn't really know what that would mean in reality and I didn't really think about it. I did not attend any breastfeeding antenatal classes, I do not remember having seen anyone breastfeed nor been around anyone who had breastfed. I was told it was the norm, that 'breast is best' and of course, I did not want to fail at this important parenting test!

My first child was born mid-Winter, dot on 37 weeks gestation as a 5lb 13oz mildly jaundiced, a very sleepy. A teeny tiny little thing that refused to latch. He refused to wake up long enough to even attempt to latch. So the midwives wheeled out 'Daisy' the industrial sized electronic pump, showed me how it worked and left me to it, toes curling with the increased after-pains.

So began the three hour cycles; pump, try and wake sleepy baby up (and keep him awake long enough) to bottle feed, burp, change nappy, settle to sleep, pump, repeat. We were discharged on day 3 with our newly purchased single electric pump in tow, happy that he didn't need phototherapy for the jaundice and that he was producing poos and wees.

Day 4 my milk came in, teeny tiny one was still refusing to wake up long enough to feed properly on a bottle, so ended up in A&E for a nasogastric tube feed of formula and some blood tests. He perked up a bit and with me being exhausted, terrified, recovering from a lot of stitches, coming down with mastitis and generally feeling awful with Day 4/5 hormonal surges and blues, we were sent home again with daily community midwife visits lined up to monitor baby's weight loss (and hopefully subsequent weight gain).

Luckily my milk supply was enough to feed a small tribe and I was able to pump for Britain. He did bounce back and gained weight brilliantly on expressed milk and my husband insisted we avoid formula despite the relentless three hour pumping cycles. Baby flourished, I slowly lost my mind.

Once the midwives were happy baby was doing well and I was seemingly happy to carry on expressing, everyone disappeared! My absolute saving grace was a health visitor who recommended nipple shields to cut out the 'middle man' of pumping, and that I attend a local support group at Penylan library (no longer running sadly). I really struggled getting my boobs out in public and had really bad social anxiety because nipple shields would be knocked flying by baby mid-feed, spraying milk everywhere. It was a snowy winter so I had a billion layers of clothes to contend with and quite honestly, I had no idea what I was doing nor the energy to figure it out. I had three rounds of antibiotics for mastitis and couldn't leave the house through fear of having to feed in public. I hated breastfeeding. I didn't want to breastfeed but continued to do so because I couldn't work out the alternative and everyone had told me formula was the devils juice and how could I fail at this basic human process!

Noone mentioned a possibility of a tongue tie. I didn't even consider it. It wasn't until he was a toddler and smashed his upper lip ripping an upper lip tie, did anyone notice the extent of his tongue tie. But he had managed to transition from shields to feeding directly, albeit with a fair amount of trapped wind (him) and sore nipples (me) and by 5 months (out of desperation) started solids. It got easier. He was only feeding at bedtime, morning and sometimes during the night if he was poorly. So we carried on.

Teeny tiny turned one years old as I discovered I was pregnant with baby number two. Having suffered from Hyperemesis gravidarium (HG) during my first pregnancy, I immediately was put on cyclizine and told I had to stop breastfeeding pronto before they would prescribe me the meds. This turned out to be incorrect information (check out the Drugs in Breastmilk service for more information on medication safe to take whilst breastfeeding) but I was already feeling rough and he weaned cold-turkey (not recommended!) with no issues, so breastfeeding journey number one was done.

I smuggled nipple shields into hospital for baby number two (by then I had caught wind that healthcare professionals either love or hate them and I just wanted out of that postnatal ward asap, with minimal fuss). She was born at 39 weeks, alert, a decent birth weight and latched onto shields straight away. Hurrah! At this point I should add, I was still under the impression that you needed huge erect nipples to successfully breastfeed and mine were neither. I later learnt that it is not as straight forward as that, but that is for another post, another time.

I fed her on shields for 5 months but unlike her older brother, she didn't simply grow into being able to latch directly onto the breast. Only through meeting other parents who had mentioned tongue tie, did I get her assessed and yep, a moderate tongue tie meaning she couldn't raise her tongue to the top of her mouth. As she was 5 months, the NHS's advice was to wean onto solids at 6 months, then cease breastfeeding if the shields were a nuisance. I'd grown more confident getting my baps out in public and really didn't want to mix things up, so paid for a private frenectomy - baby 2 was feeding without shields within a week. I continued to feed until she was 20 months when I fell pregnant with baby 3....

Who bowled into the world a fully fledged, fully competent breastfeeder!

Yes, I had a bit more experience, no, I didn't do anything differently, I was just blessed with a baby that just did it. We had 2.5 years of such a lovely breastfeeding journey and I felt genuinely sad when it came to an end with my oh so sicky pregnancy number 4.

I went on to have another eager feeder, who only needed a bit of positioning support in the first few weeks. I survived a few cracked nipples and toe curling feeds but by now I had the experience and knowledge to motivate me to continue. He is over 5 years old and still feeds once or twice a day. Do I think this is wierd? Before becoming a parent I would have said abso-blinkin-lutely. Do others think it's wierd? Probably, not that they'd dare tell me.

Much like my approach entering this feeding malarky, I don't think too much about it. As long as he's happy and I'm happy, the World Health Organisation recommends exclusive breastmilk for the first 6 months, then alongside appropriate foods for up to two years and beyond. Breastfeeding has got me out of many scrapes during illnesses so bad he hasn't been able to eat or drink as much, and many a tantrum. It has been a useful tool to help navigate those early years, not just for nutrition. My milk supply has now completely dried up and we are entering the world of natural term weaners, which I'm sure will provide me with more lessons to learn.

It was in preparation for baby four and during Covid, that I wanted to deepen my knowledge of breastfeeding/infant feeding as a professional. Having been through all the things, I wanted to use my experience to support other parents navigating the very nuanced learning curve of how to feed your child. I trained as a peer supporter, then breastfeeding counsellor with the ABM and volunteer on the National Breastfeeding helpline. I also support infant feeding families face to face in clinic, through my work as a chiropractor, as I continue to clock up the 1000 clinical hours required to qualify as a lactation consultant.

I have worked as a chiropractor since my early 20s, treating babies with musculoskeletal complaints, some of whom presented with colic and feeding issues, but it has only been in the past 10 years that I really got an insight into how incredibly complex feeding a baby is, both physiologically and mentally.

If you are someone who is navigating this journey with all it's bumps and twists, I applaud you, I see you. Do not feel you are alone and support is out there. If you need signposting to local support services or would like to come in to clinic, Get in Touch, or get in touch with

National Breastfeeding Helpline for free support via phone, email and social media, 24/7, from expert volunteers with lived experience of breastfeeding.